Zero Means Faultless
by chocykitty
Summary: Because Philonecron is pretty creepy to poor Zee, and I wouldn't put it past him to creepily watch Zee in his sleep. Philonezee, one-sided, but quite obvious.


Philonecron was actually quite a pleasant demon. So he could not fathom why he had developed feelings for a mortal.

Much less a _child_ mortal. Or, well, teenager...

Pedophile was such a strong, unpleasant word... So crude, _so vulgar..._

And Philonecron was, of course, neither crude nor vulgar, nor unpleasant, nor strong... Physically, at least. He was likely one of the most mentally strong inhabitants of the underworld.

_...Ex-inhabitants, _Philonecron thought simply _rude _Hades had been, banishing him.

His Zero was _never_ rude.

_No,_ Philonecron ordered himself, pushing away the thought. _None of that._ Was he really a ...p-word... if he wasn't attracted to his Zero for his youth?

Philonecron knew that still counted, probably. But he would have liked Zero just the same had he been forty-eight, or a two-hundred-year-old demon, or a demon three-thousand years older than himself.

But he would probably have never noticed Zero had he been any of those others. All that brought them together was the shadow-stealing business.

And on to the shadow-stealing business Philonecron's mind wandered. That business had led to another business, the taking-over-the-universe business, which had led to the upstart gods imprisoning him in _Phil._ The only time _he _(Phil_onecron)_ was truly free was in his sleep. During wakefulness, he was trapped in a prison of the one named _Phil. Phil _was really boring. _Phil_ sold low-quality suits. _Phil _didn't even know who Ze-

_No._

_But he's so charming!_ Another side of him protested. _And witty, and sweet, and don't even get me _started _on those doe-eyes..._

_No,_ insisted the side that was determined to let Zero go. _Stop being so dependent._

_Why? _Philonecron demanded petulantly. Now his two selves were in the black room, facing each other, arguing. Where had once sat a single Philonecron in a wheelchair stood a window to Zero's life. He was playing a game in which he kicked a round object around a field.

Philonecron sighed; both of him. One of him sighed with longing, and the other with sadness. _Why can't it be? _Asked the one who was gazing into the glass with excruciating pain and intense hope that _maybe, just maybe, Zero would come rescue him..._

_Because, _the sad Philonecron answered. _Even if you could get to him, he would still despise you. You're the _enemy.

_But _why_? _The pitiable Philoncron asked. _I could use the-_

_The what? The blood? It wouldn't be him. Zero faults, you said- I found one. He _hates_ you._

_No,_ Philonecron shook his head, gazing at his other self, morphing and twisting and becoming something more... something more... Indelicate. The other Philonecron had _no_ subtlety, no refinement, no _grace._

_He is _glad _you're gone, _the other one said. _He hates you, so why would he deserve your silly little nickname? His name is Zachary, befitting of a faulted one._

Philonecron stared at the monster in confusion. This was no longer 'his other self'. No, Philonecron would never even _think _any of those things.

_Zero means no faults. He is my Zero. He has no faults in my eyes, _Philonecron told the monster staring back at him.

But the monster had had a point; Zero didn't want him around. And so Philonecron made a decision.

His mission was no longer to take over the universe. No, his mission was now far greater.

Philonecron's new mission would be to protect his Zero's happiness, even if he was buried and far away. (That wasn't to say he knew _how-_ he just _would_.)

_Zero means faultless. You are my faultless, _he whispered to the glass. His wide-eyed face was smushed up against the mirror in a moment of indignity.

Far away from Phil's napping form, in a sunny soccer field, Zee thought he heard someone say something _extremely_ strange.

"Was that you?" Zee asked the person next to him.

"What?" the person asked back.

"Did you say something?"

"...No?"


End file.
